The Not-So-Sexy Infertility Adventures of a Girl in the Big Apple

Tuesday, February 21, 2012


Ladies, thank you for all of the encouraging words yesterday.  I would be lying if I said that I wasn't still concerned about the lack of cramping, but rationally I know it's silly to think it means anything one way or another.

It's 5dp3dt, and I'm feeling fairly crummy.  Not physically so much as emotionally.  It's purely hormone related.  I was already feeling quite emotional going into the FET with the estrogen patches & Lupron.  Now after being on 4 patches every other day for a while I've reached a whole new level of hormonal craziness.  I literally feel like I could cry every second.  I tear up at nothing 5 times a day.  And I am not a crier, so this is totally bizarre behavior for me!

I am thinking of trying to have a big cry every morning before I start my day like the Holly Hunter character in "Broadcast News" (have you ever seen that movie? - it's utterly fantastic.)  I think if I could do that it would tide me over until at least the for thought.

A couple of you have asked me about my beta date and if I plan to POAS.  Beta is Monday, Feb 27th - a week from now.  I will most definitely POAS at some point because I want to be prepared.  But I'd like to wait as long as possible so I don't drive myself too crazy.  Having said that, I make no promises given my mental/emotional state - I could break down at any time!

But oddly, despite feeling incredibly emotional I don't feel anxious.  I don't have that pace-around-the-room-freaking-out kind of energy that I've had in the past.  I just feel tired and teary and sort of out-of-it.

Just for kicks, here's my daily log of "symptoms":
1) Insomnia - Better now that I am off Medrol.  Am sleeping for long chunks but still getting up to pee all the time.
2) Appetite changes - This is a new one.  Last couple of days I've found myself not really wanting to eat much during the day, but then waking up in the middle of the night with serious hunger pangs.  Last night I had to get up twice to eat something before I could go back to sleep.
3) Cramping - Much less now (as I've said) but still feeling some light, intermittent cramping, particularly at night.
4) Breast tenderness - Very slight, but still there.

Thanks to everyone for their continued support, this is going to be a bloody long week.


  1. Sounds like some promising symptons too me :) Good luck!

  2. hang in there! thinking of you. hoping that the mood lifts soon and that time passes as quickly as possible.


  3. Stay Strong! Is any familiar with ovualtion kit predictor kits... my doc has me doing one and I have no idea what surge looks like. I think I had my darkest line today... buy not sure if someone could give me some pointers I'd appreciate it.

    Again, Sending positive thoughts your way!

  4. Thanks so much for your help, I have been searching all morning... but there isn't a lot of info or pics out there. :)

  5. Hang in there, I know the torture. I had little cramping in the beginning and didn't really start having stronger cramps again until week 5. Sending you all my positive thoughts until your beta day!

  6. You are doing great newbie, I'm also incredibly emotional on 4 patches every other day for over a week now, I love the idea of letting it all out in the mornings, ha! I might start doing that myself :) That will get Dan out the door pretty fast in the mornings, lol. I will check out that movie. So, did you like the Teatro?

  7. Hang in there newbie! These hormones are the worst. I hope this week goes by quickly for you.

  8. Remember the bowling alley sweetie, try to stay in the middle, great of me to say when yesterday I almost jumped off a bridge, but it is important for you to stay calm right now, there are really no symptoms at this time, everyone says that, I cannot tell you how many twinges and cramps I've gotten on a BFN, it meant nothing. My friend that just got her BFP was analysing everything and she was also depressed she had no symptoms, and look at her now, she is almost 7 weeks. Hang in there, I know these hormones do not help AT ALL. Try to stay distracted, have you checked out Tosh.0 yet? I have eaten at Tamayo and liked it a lot! Yes, right at the corner across the street. Good pick of your hubby, I have to try the other one. xoxo

  9. I hate, hate, hate, hate the 2WW!!!

    Fingers crossed - all you can do now is wait. This week is the worst this is when I fall apart! Go and see a movie with hubby or go up to the cabin.

    Thinking of you!

  10. I will say this forever... don't put stock into any possible or non-existant symptoms. Every pregnancy is different, even in the same woman. I was convinced my cycle failed. We psych ourselves out in the 2ww. In my opinion... hold out as long as you can on POAS. It's far too soon right now. And even at 11dp3dt, on my beta day, the line was barely visible (I waited until after my beta results to POAS). Thinking of you!! FX!!

  11. hang in there hun :) I will send not putting stock into any signs or lack there of. Everyone is different and so so many don't notice anything at all. I didn't POAS and was so happy I didn't....but I know some need to. Just don't get discouraged if they say negative, it won't necessarily mean the blood test will be! xo

  12. Hang in there, Newbie! I swear the TWW is the worst. And don't think too much about symptoms - though its easier said than done I know.

  13. You can't take any notice of symptoms this early on. But very best of luck.